Self portrait - The moving cross country version

I'm afraid I don't have time for a "good" stick figure drawing today.  This is what I looked like about eight hours ago.  Since that time I've been cleaning and packing for the third day in a row.  The truck is loaded (not everything fit, so we're going to try and make it fit tonight). Now all that's left to do is load both cars and drive 1200 miles. Gaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!  I'll see you guys in about a week on the other end of this waking nightmare known as moving cross country.  Wish me luck!~

Mary's Request

Mary won first place in my recent contest and as part of her prize she was able to request a "stick figure" drawing. She suggested I draw a Shrek-like picture of her as an Ogre who then magically turns into a lovely princess after receiving Paranormalcy, (the other part of her prize). I did my best to oblige Mary, and she posted the results on her blog here. Thanks for playing Mary, and I'll have you know I spent an extra five minutes or so on your drawing than I normally devote to my "art."

The rest of the story/contest winners!

I had the hardest time picking a winner for the "What's the Story?" contest. You guys were all so dang funny and creative, not to mention many of you came close to the real story.

Some of the entry highlights:
Tricia started things off with her finely honed funny skills and suggested that the mysterious object was a "a bang trimmer and reverse mohawk doer." Clearly my bangs were having a very bad day (actually year) when this picture was taken. As always, I would like to thank Tricia for raising the level of humor on my blog. It's much needed.

Chantele brought in the possibility of dream catchers and rain dances. Intriguing and the object did look distinctly Native American. Kasie later expanded on this idea to include an Indian Chief giving me a headdress and requiring me to dance, which I couldn't do since I only knew the running man.

Then my father decided to get in on the action and reveal to all my readers that this was simply how I looked every morning when I woke up. True. Thanks, Dad.

WolfLuva said I had a unicorn horn, which was funny in and of itself, but mostly I just love her screen name, Wolfluva. I almost gave her a prize based on that alone!

Also, I have to thank Jessie for interpreting the Chinese comments I always get. Jessie, can you take a job as a full time interpreter? If so, you're hired!

Seriously, I wish I had time to mention all the entries they were so great!

Laurel was the first to pick up on the Christmas tree. Kudos to her for her impressive observation skills. This was followed by many other Christmastime theories.  Indeed it was Christmas, and I loved all the variations on what could be causing the look of teenage angst on my face.  But it was Mary who came closest to the truth with the following explanation:

I think you're at your grandparents house at Christmas time and your wondering when you can go home - the party's getting kind of lame. The blurry dangler is one of your grandma many homemade ornaments.

I was at my Grandparent's house for Christmas Eve.  I was helping with the traditional Christmas Eve program and getting ready to play some Christmas songs on the piano.  The ornament was one of many homemade ornaments on my grandmother's tree. 

The only thing Mary didn't get right was the reason for my expression.  I actually loved being at my grandparents during Christmas.  What I didn't love was getting my picture taken, and my little sister was the queen of picture taking. She tried to be sneaky and get one from behind the tree, but as you can see I caught her.  This picture is famous in my family.  I was that year's official Grinch.

 Recognize me now?

For her excellent guessing skills I award Mary with first prize, a pre-order copy of Kiersten White's Paranormalcy, which comes out the end of this month and a lovely stick figure drawing. Congratulations,Mary and thanks for participating.

Second place goes to Laurel for picking up on the Christmas theme in the first place. Laurel gets bragging rights and a stick figure drawing of her choice.

Mary and Laurel, let me know what you would like me to draw. It can be anything, I promise I will do my best! Mary if you could shoot me an email with your address at candice_kennington(at)comcast(dot)net I will get that book ordered for you today!

Thanks to everyone who participated. I really thought the entries were awesome and wish I was rich enough to give you all a book! I think I will run a similar contest in the future so that I can give away copies of upcoming author's books. I like the idea of supporting debut authors.

Sticking it to the Woman (The refusing to shower in the mornings rant)

No, this is not a statement of feminism, more just one of fact since it seems that it's woman's expectation who rules my life (my husband is very accepting of me and all my imperfections).  And when I worked in my career field most of my bosses were women.  Now that I'm a stay-at-home mom I'm surrounded by women.  So I'll say it again, I'm sticking it to the woman, the one that makes me think I need to get up every morning and fix my hair to clean my house. She has many other expectations for me (ones I'm sure we'll get to in future installments of this rant), but the getting-ready-for-the-day-and-the-showering one is what I'm focusing on today.

Why would I shower in the morning so that I could remain clean for all of two minutes before I'm covered in boogers, dishwater, chocolate milk and any number of unnamed and unknown substances?  Listen here, Woman--THAT MAKES NO SENSE!  And I hate things that don't make sense.  Therefor I am henceforth (yes I used two conjunctive adverbs right by each other, get over it WOMAN) reserving my shower until the early to late afternoon and on occasion evenings.  That way I can exercise, clean, cook, garden, and make award winning play doh sculptures without cursing your name every minute of the day.  And since I'm not showering until later in the day, why would I change out of my pajamas?  As I said before, that makes no sense.

My life is about to change. From now on my husband will no longer need to plug his nose to give me a hug after work.  I will enjoy eating my dinner in clean clothes.  My sheets will not be stained with residue of housework.  I will wear new pajamas every night and the same clothes for days in a row.  It's gonna be epic, awesome, life changing.  And to prove I'm serious I ran on the treadmill in my nightgown this morning.

So take THAT, Woman!

In unrelated news, my contest closes tonight at midnight.  Your entries have been awesome! I seriously don't know how I'm going to choose.

The New/Old Blogtacular - Win a Copy of Paranormalcy!

Since I'm beginning anew with my new/old blog (see previous post), I thought I should do something I've never done before ... a contest! I hear they're all the rage. So I figure what the heck, I'll give it a try. Maybe we can have a little fun, and if you win I will pre-order a copy of Kiersten White's Paranormalcy and have it shipped directly to you! How cool is that?! If you don't know how cool that is then I highly suggest you check this out.

The winner and runner-up will also receive a custom stick-figure drawing by yours truly.  It's guaranteed to take me at least three minutes to complete and will be sent directly to your inbox.  I bet you can't wait to get your hands on one of these (note the sarcasm in my blog voice).

*Example only.  Your drawing may or may not be of similar quality.

So now that we know the stakes, let's get down to the nitty gritty.  Time to play...

What's the Story Here? 

The following is a crop of a picture of me (no, I have no shame. Why do you ask?).  Your task is to tell me what you think the full picture will reveal (e.g. what are those objects in the picture, why do I have such a lovely expression on my face, what am I doing, etc.). The length of the answer is up to you. It could be a few words or a few paragraphs.  The person who gets the closest will win. If nobody is anywhere near the right answer I'll just choose my favorite guesses.  Winners and full picture will be revealed in one week, so you have until midnight Tuesday to enter.  Let the games begin!

Take 2

I was thinking the other day how nice it would be if I could take what I know now, after a few years of blogging and being active in the writing community, and start over.  And then I realized, hey wait a minute, I can.  I do it every time I start a new book, why not on my blog too?  After all, it is MY blog.

So without further Ado I present to you, Suffering From Writer's Blog TAKE 2.  Apparently the first year and a half was just practice. 

Now for the nitty gritty--what to expect from my blog:

-Stick Figures (done exclusively with the highly technical and exclusive program, Microsoft Paint)
-An ocassional outcry of frustration using strong language (like sassafrassa and dagnabit) 
-Antics, lots and lots of antics
-An utter lack of filtering between my brain and the type written page
-TBD (Yes, the rest is To Be Determined, but you can also expect lots of acronyms because I love them)

**I've re-added a few favorite posts for blog flavor.